#1
By age 25, you should have:

-a failed youtube career
-a foreign film you watched accidently yet always recommend
-an unfinished 12 chapter fanfiction
-an unfounded hatred of tik tok
-had enough
ellewasamistake / Via twitter.com

#2
By the age of 25, you should have:

• student loan debt
• a favorite spoon
• a pack of gum
• one song you can safely sing during karaoke
• a suspicious neighborhood squirrel that always seems to follow you when you’re outside- but you can’t prove it
roxiqt / Via twitter.com

#3
By age 35 you should have a kitchen cabinet dedicated entirely to plastic bags that contain other, smaller plastic bags.
peakysblinder / Via twitter.com

#4
By age 25 you should have at least one leg joint that cracks like a distant gunshot on a crisp winter morning every time you stand up.
NightlifeMingus / Via twitter.com

#5
By the age of 35, every woman should:

- be walking around the house saying, “Why is every single light on? Do I look like I’m made of money? Open a curtain for once, will you?”
- wonder aloud why this room that she just tidied is messy again
- have developed a library of sighs
anne_theriault / Via twitter.com

#6
By age 35 you should have saved at least 28 single socks without a matching one to make a pair, retirement experts say.
marcusjdl / Via twitter.com

#7
By the age of 30 you should have

1. 10 dollars in your account
2. A bad relationship story
3. Anxiety
4. Back Pain
PersonaPrickly / Via twitter.com

#8
By the age of 26 you should have:

- a bathroom cabinet full of abandoned skincare solutions
- a deep hatred of at least one type of alcohol
- a collection of owl stuff you can’t bear to part with cause you told your family you liked owls one time
leahviathan / Via twitter.com

#9
By age 35 you should have a drawer in your house filled with random items. That way, when you can’t find something, you’ll just check the junk drawer. And boom, just like that, you won’t find it there either.
IvoryGazelle / Via twitter.com

#10
By age 27 you should have:

2 failed blogs/podcasts
8 pairs of “good” underwear
50 pairs of trash underwear
12,000 unread emails
1 trick knee
_tori_belle / Via twitter.com

#11
By age 35 you should have a collection of excuses for cancelling plans and a system in place for how to realistically rotate them.
TheAndrewNadeau / Via twitter.com

#12
By age 27 you should have:

—big fork (wide)
—strong relationship with the park ducks ( feeding them)
—a pinterest page that you abandoned
—over 300 pieces of Gumby paraphernalia
UncleZumba / Via twitter.com

#13
By age 35 you should be able to write an email to customer support that will simultaneously evoke fear, love, respect, and all of your money back.
JILD / Via twitter.com

#14
By age 35, you should have:

$175 in savings
$150 in checking
$30,000 in debt
An 8 year old laptop
A five year old phone
Furniture you picked off the street
Live in a studio apartment a friend lent you for cheaps because they love you, and a dog.
JShahryar / Via twitter.com

#15
By age 35 you should have reached that stage of time confusion where you’re convinced the 90s was only 10 years ago.
sennydreadful / Via twitter.com

#16
By age 35 you should have at least 6 expired spice jars that you think you maybe used once but you pack them carefully each time you move, because you have cooking plans …
mchris4duke / Via twitter.com

#17
By age 35, every man should:

-be looking for the tv remote and saying “Aww, the kids are always losing it, why can’t they just leave it here on the coffee table? Who touched the thermostat!? Where on earth did I leave my beer?”
DC_Sports_fan / Via twitter.com

#18
By age 35, you should have lost most of your real life friends to misunderstandings, changing priorities, distance and unknown reasons and found a few hundred online strangers to laugh with.
nimmypal / Via twitter.com

#19
By age 25 you should have:

-multiple pair of slippers
-medical bills from something dumb you did when you were 22
-at least 3 expensive candles
-a deeper understanding of how meaningless life is
-a 5 step skin care routine
-holy sh*t it’s 10:00 i gotta get in bed it’s so late
hannacantrell / Via twitter.com

#20
By age 35 you should be able to re-watch Bridget Jones and think ‘You’re only 30 and you manage to afford to live alone?’
EmmaIllustrate / Via twitter.com

#21
By age 25, you should have:

Someone who has you blocked on social media for no reason.
Someone you call an ex that you never actually dated, cried because you missed the freeway exit at least once, at least one stomach or mental health issue, and weekly breakdowns/anxiety attacks.
JustYourGirlK / Via twitter.com

#22
By age 35: you should be able to do a load of laundry, without leaving it in the washer for so long you have to wash it again.
circleofdeceit / Via twitter.com

#23
By age 25 you should have:

- a good grasp of how much toiletries really cost
- an embarrassing dating history
- at least one (1) friendship fallout
- actual body pains
YoungStarPhils / Via twitter.com

#24
By age 35 you should have an entire cabinet filled with Tupperware containers. That don’t match. Just a bunch of random bottoms and tops that come cascading out on you every time you open the door.
FoodosaurusRex / Via twitter.com

#25
By age 35 you should have a chair in your bedroom used only for holding clothes that aren’t dirty enough for the laundry but that you’re too lazy to put away.
moron_online / Via twitter.com

Preview photo credit: tinyfoxlab.com