#1
Listening to my kids argue on vacation is just like being at home except I have an ocean view.
sarcasticmommy4 / Via twitter.com

#2
If you bring food and kids to the beach it’s best to just think of sand as a condiment.
simoncholland / Via twitter.com

#3
My kids are giving all the people on this plane a hard lesson in birth control right now.
nicfit75 / Via twitter.com

#4
On a flight I once asked the flight attendant to switch my seat as I was sitting next to a screaming baby.
Apparently you’re not allowed to do that if it’s your own baby.
DaddingAround / Via twitter.com

#5
It started as a family road trip but quickly morphed into a Bathrooms of America tour.
mommajessiec / Via twitter.com

#6
I love going on vacation because I get to be woken up at 5am by my kids in an exotic place.
FatherWithTwins / Via twitter.com

#7
80% of taking your kids on vacation is keeping them out of gift shops.
Cheeseboy22 / Via twitter.com

#8
Traveling with kids is just yelling, “STOP THAT OR I’M TAKING YOU HOME!” in a different city.
sarcasticmommy4 / Via twitter.com

#9
My wife suggested taking the kids on a camping vacation and I reminded my wife that it would be unfair to bring that kind of noise pollution into the wilderness.
thedad / Via twitter.com

#10
It’s not a family vacation until someone threatens to throw a prized possession from a moving vehicle.
amydillon / Via twitter.com

#11
By the end of a vacation with small children, you look forward to getting an interrupted night’s sleep in your own bed.
mommajessiec / Via twitter.com

#12
The one big perk of going on vacation with my kids is that the bags under my eyes now have a tan.
DadandBuried / Via twitter.com

#13
Good thing we spent thousands of dollars traveling to another country so my kids could play their iPads in a hotel room instead of at home.
UnfilteredMama / Via twitter.com

#14
If you guys ever want to know what it felt like to wear the scarlet ‘A’, board a plane with 4 kids.
JennyPentland / Via twitter.com

#15
Having a kid: $
Having multiple kids: $$
Going on vacation with your kids: $$$
Spending the entire trip furiously screaming at your kids, ruining everyone’s experience: PRICELESS
DadandBuried / Via twitter.com

#16
Parent: What was your favorite ride on your trip to Disney World?
Toddler: The baggage carousel at the airport!
Parent: [sigh]
ParentNormal / Via twitter.com

#17
What’s better than a 12 hour drive with a screaming 1 year old? Not including hepatitis.
VancityReynolds / Via twitter.com

#18
Kids’ complaints on vacation:
- No wifi on beach
- Sand is sandy
- Ocean has salt in it
- Lobsters? I want pizza.
- Too outdoorsy outside
HousewifeOfHell / Via twitter.com

#19
I’m back from a weekend away with the kids.
Notice I did not use the word “vacation”?it
That was deliberate.
LetMeStart / Via twitter.com

#20
There are men who have scaled Everest who wouldn’t dare to travel with two kids under 3.
daxshepard / Via twitter.com

Preview photo credit: sarcasticmommy4 / twitter.com