#1
Starting a new high school & didn’t have the uniform yet so Dad wrote a note excusing me. I copied it in my handwriting, the school checked it by calling him, & it went on file to prevent against forgeries. For years if I didn’t want to do something, I just wrote myself a note
MelodyRules_ / Via twitter.com

#2
Not me, but after fleeing Europe during the Holocaust—in which almost his entire family died—my grandfather got a job as a banker in NY by lying that he had a college degree but the records had been lost in the war. He worked successfully as a banker for the rest of his life.
MaggieAstor / Via twitter.com

#3
My best friend and I wanted to go to a Blink 182 concert in high school but couldn’t afford tickets, so we told everyone in our extremely Baptist Oklahoma town that God called us to spread the gospel at an evil secular concert but we needed donations to get in. We turned a profit
mlockwoodporter / Via twitter.com

#4
One of my law school professors was a notorious drunk and he called on me one day when I was totally unprepared and he was visibly drunk. I dead stared at him for a minute and then nodded and said “and that’s it” and he thought I had answered, said “yes, excellent” and carried on
anastywoman / Via twitter.com

#5
In yr 9 I was woefully unprepared (lazy) for a history assignment, so handed in a yellow folder with my drama assignment in it. I spent the weekend on the history paper & took it to the teacher Monday morning, in a different yellow folder, apologising profusely for the mix up.
eskimojo / Via twitter.com

#6
Got tired of waiting for a job offer due to bureaucratic slowness. Told the hiring person I had an offer elsewhere & needed a decision. Got my desired offer the next day &d later learned the starting salary was significantly higher due to concern I’d go to the other “job.”
maretorliss / Via twitter.com

#7
In college i legally married, and then peacefully divorced, a platonic friend so we qualified to live off-campus.
AlixEHarrow / Via twitter.com

#8
My husband and I told our kids Barney died so we wouldn’t have to watch it anymore.
margaretmharv / Via twitter.com

#9
when I was in 5th grade I didn’t want to write a paper on the american revolution so I just… didn’t. when the teacher handed them back I told her I didn’t get mine but definitely handed it in. she said she remembered reading it and just gave me like a 90%.
atlasblue85 / Via twitter.com

#10
My SAT II essay prompt was “Can lying ever be justified?” I wrote about lying to comfort a dying friend who didn’t exist, which also based on a (non-dying) friend’s story from the year before (that was also a lie). My high score was the true proof that lying can be justified.
mackenziewalton / Via twitter.com

#11
When I was a young teen my family and I moved into a very affluent suburb with a ton of little kids. I put out flyers everywhere saying I had extensive babysitting training when in fact I had just read all the Babysitters Club books. I ended up be an awesome babysitter tbh
tpeak10 / Via twitter.com

#12
Was a runaway street kid (didn’t look it) in NYC circa 2001. Stood street level outside a basement club. Group of 5 came up to me thinking I’m the door guy and asking if there’s a cover. Told ‘em “$10”. Got $50 on the spot & booked it before the real door guy caught on.
KJPaulo777 / Via twitter.com

#13
I was auditioning for a very competitive children’s choir but didn’t know how to read music even though I checked yes. So I listened carefully outside of the room to the person before me and sang the piece from memory when it was my turn.
NateRethorn / Via twitter.com

#14
As a small town 13 y/o hoodlum my friends & i were caught out way after curfew & i don’t know what possessed me to saunter up to the cop car & say “excuse me? have you seen an orange cat? our parents can’t know we lost her!” but it is the most self-possessed i have ever been
ashleybrandt / Via twitter.com

#15
I once claimed Dad was a v conservative minister who wouldn’t let me date … to get away from a baritone in HS chorus who wanted to date me because my skin was beautifully pale, like a dead person’s. (He wanted to be an undertaker.)
rjayne_n / Via twitter.com

#16
When I was 16, I faked a mission trip to Guatemala (paperwork and all) to my parents (both pastors) so that I could go party in Panama City, Florida, for spring break.
larimah / Via twitter.com

#17
I got a job at a summer camp as the outdoor/nature counsellor because I said I had studied plants and wilderness survival, but I basically just made things up, including the names of all the plants we saw. So I feel like there are adults now who call everything the wrong name
mathewi / Via twitter.com

#18
One time for my own entertainment I pretended not to know what a donut was when an ex boyfriend’s friend mentioned wanting one. everytime he tried to explain it I said, “oooohhhh, you mean a bagel.”
mominiquematti / Via twitter.com

#19
Also, my wife teases me that when I moved in with her in NYC after college I said it was only for a little while until I found my own apartment. It was really hard finding an apartment without actually ever looking for one. I never found one on my own.
harrisj / Via twitter.com

#20
I told my dad I was getting laid so I wouldn’t get my a*s beat for staying out all night playing D&D with my friends…
cybin_farmer / Via twitter.com

Preview photo credit: oliverdahl.com