Listen up everyone we’re changing the century thing. from now on the 18th century means the 1800s, 17th century is 1700s, and so on. we’re not doing the weird subtraction thing anymore. we’re changing it. it’s over
rinbcage / Via twitter.com
anyone who was a “pleasure to have in class” has an anxiety disorder now
jacob_derodes / Via twitter.com
Everyone has that one friend who you call by their last name
NathanJain_ / Via twitter.com
ur cousins are either ur bff’s or y’all don’t fw each other at all
germanndasavage / Via twitter.com
Maybe people just want headphone jack on their phones
reckless / Via twitter.com
People from high school get so bitter when you unfollow them on social media like sorry stacy i haven’t talked to you in 2 yrs and don’t really care to see how you’ve evolved from a bit*h to a bit*h who works for a pyramid scheme
olchave / Via twitter.com
IF U UNPLUG THE WIFI BOX FOR 1 SEC THE WHOLE HOUSE ACT LIKE THEY BOUT 2 DIE YOU’LL SEE PPL COME OUT ROOMS YOU ANIT NVR SEEN BEFORE
PluckDaGreat / Via twitter.com
girls named megan are the worst because there are infinity ways to spell megan and every girl named megan is the kind of girl who gets extremely offended when you spell her name wrong. “uhhh it’s meaghaheahn, duma*s!” ok sorry maugenst please forgive me and also leave
squidslippers / Via twitter.com
In my experience, adulthood is mostly piling stuff up on surfaces and then eventually having to clean off those surfaces
helgagrace / Via twitter.com
Is your dad really your dad if he doesn’t say “who?” after talking about any of your friends even if he’s known them for literally 7 years??
kelkatcox / Via twitter.com
Can anyone else confirm that girls have 4 types of showers, a “quick body wash”, a “hair and body shower”, a proper “exfoliate shave, moisturizer, hair mask, singalong” and then a “depressed leave me alone I wanna die” shower.
saddgay / Via twitter.com
I’m at the point in my life where I check my email as part of my social media line up
Bai_Golden / Via twitter.com
I just wanna say I am SO thankful for fu*king potatoes. they are literally good in any form?? french fries? smack. mashed potatoes? smack. baked potatoes? smack. tater tots? smack. skillet potatoes? SMACK. name a form of potatoes that isn’t good….I’ll wait
siurras / Via twitter.com
If bohemian rhapsody starts playing and the person you’re with doesn’t start singing along and at least attempt the different voices, you really need to leave them alone. You just don’t need that kind of negativity in your life.
ohhchunky / Via twitter.com
*Girls in the bathroom at the bar* omg you’re gorgeous, here use my makeup, screw your ex you’re so much better than him, add me on snap, ily5ever
*Girls outside of the bathroom* if you bump into me one more time I’m going to fight you
Jodiiilynne / Via twitter.com
PSA: Don’t EVER let your printer know that you’ve waited until the last minute to print something out and you’re in hurry because they can sense fear.
OkigboXL / Via twitter.com
level 1: venting by crying
level 10: venting by faking a conversation in your head with someone
level 113: venting by creating an intricate alternate universe scenario in your head where you’re a celebrity on a talk show dramatically explaining the sh*t you’ve been going thru
calista_jpg_ / Via twitter.com
The most important thing I’ve learned in life, and I can’t stress this enough: you gotta make a salad in a bigger bowl than you think
KevinFarzad / Via twitter.com
FRIEND: so how are you?
ME: I’m well, thanks!
FRIEND: what’s new?
ME: not much!
FRIEND: well, what have you been up to?
ME: why are you doing this to me.
smithsara79 / Via twitter.com
me at 16: leave me alone mom im an adult
me at 23: mom if u dont come to the dentist with me ill end my sh*t
garyfromteenmom / Via twitter.com
I’m gonna be 89 years old in a retirement home and still be traumatized when I see back to school commercials.
ahhdanaa / Via twitter.com