#1
What if u cracked ur knuckles and ur fingers started to glow like glow sticks
shonakellyx3 / Via twitter.com

#2

DAREDEVllLS / Via twitter.com

#3
I forgot my knitting needles in the freezer
GailWalden6 / Via twitter.com

#4

el_branbran / Via twitter.com

#5

melpal_ / Via twitter.com

#6
People born in 2001 are 8 now. let that sink in
finnothy / Via twitter.com

#7
Shrek be like “dönkæ”
juannisaac / Via twitter.com

#8

PeterJMarshall / Via twitter.com

#9
What came first.. da minion or da bob
fIame / Via twitter.com

#10

6thJenIMormon / Via twitter.com

#11
Regular back:
-will hurt eventually
-boring
-stupid bones

Backstreet’s back:
-alright
joeygllghr / Via twitter.com

#12

Fishnuts / Via twitter.com

#13
ladies, if he:

- never texts you back
- always interjects with unsolicited advice
- reads your personal documents
- constantly tries to help you format paragraphs
- is a sentient paper clip

he’s not your man. he’s clippy the microsoft word office assistant
rachel / Via twitter.com

#14
“Bro, you want this pamphlet?”
“Brochure”
SkinnerSteven / Via twitter.com

#15

VIEWSFROMJAY23 / Via twitter.com

#16

LowkeyNerdyOG / Via twitter.com

#17

taylorcote13 / Via twitter.com

#18
recipe writers: tsp is teaspoon, tbsp is tablespoon
me, an intellectual: tusp
recipe writer: no
me: tubusp
agbouskila / Via twitter.com

#19
You: taking the mick
Me, an intellectual: extracting the Michael
lilswnbrn / Via twitter.com

#20
Crocs but thigh high
dxxnya / Via twitter.com

21#

shitaliah / Via twitter.com

22#

confused / Via twitter.com

23#
Getting double bounced on a trampoline was the last time i felt something
CaucasianJames / Via twitter.com

24#

BhadDhad / Via twitter.com

25#

montanaisntreal / Via twitter.com

26#

tay_mc_ / Via twitter.com

27#

Ritz_Tweeting / Via twitter.com

28#

stabbyloki / Via twitter.com

29#

_ChaChaChance / Via twitter.com

Via BuzzFeed, Preview photo credit: taylorcote13 / twitter